Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I have already put on my inside pants.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
