dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
It sounds like heaven mixed with world peace and orgasms. The acoustics in this car are awesome. Or it's the weed idk either way it's great
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I feel like my cat and I are playing mind games. I need more friends.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
