omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
