The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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