Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
She kept saying the tortilla understood her. I honestly don't know where she found a tortilla at the pool.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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