all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Randomize
