ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Your favorite bartender is back from prision
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
is that a dick in a sweater?
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
I was so drunk at your wedding that Uber is now showing up in my Spotify recent searches.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
Randomize
