I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
This guy just walked into class and first thing he did was grab the garbage can, walk to his desk and say "just in case"
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
I'm sorry that I ate boneless ribs off of your sister, but that is no reason to drink my alcohol.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
