the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
