well you can't waste a boner
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
