blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Driving, getting head and talking to your boss on the phone is not a good combination. I nearly died
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
