It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I have feelings that need drinking.
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
I woke up this morning next to my computer with Google search results for "how to put out a fire."
I'm very scared to turn around.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
