He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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