i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
You tried to convince me you were sober by doing jumping jacks. For an hour.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I just want nice things and good sex
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
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