i just used burnetts to get spraypaint off the floor of my dorm lobby
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I asked if he wanted to sext and he just started sending me pictures of his beard.
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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