bella threw up all over the kitchen floor then looked at me, laughed, and walked away
isn't bella the cat???
that she is
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
