Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
