Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
I checked into jail on foursquare
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
I party with great urgency now.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
Randomize
