I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I don't really want to explain what i mean by this so just answer yes or no. are 5 cows enough?
Randomize