Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
Last time he went to Europe, every time he started drinking he would wake up in a different country with no memory. There is no way he can be tour leader.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
