she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
