i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
Randomize
