There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
god damn woman. you are like the herpes of drunk texting. you never go away.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
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