Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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