to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
two words...techno handjob
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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