if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
using smirnoff bottles as a pillow actually isnt as uncomfortable as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
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