we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize
