I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
Other than trying to finger me on the couch in the middle of the bar a few times, you were fine.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
Randomize
