they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
