5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
Randomize