i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
my binge eating and her being stoned all the time has reduced us to a bowl of chinese candies, frozen bacon and a stick of butter, we do however have enough alcohol to start our own liquor store.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
This is where you say "Why yes we will drink with reckless abandon and hopefully not be in a church parking lot again."
Finding that toy duck there was weird right?
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
my mom walked in on me eating her out, and i can never kiss my mother again.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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