did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
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