Umm I'm too high to move.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Randomize