idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
Randomize