Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
