We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
Randomize
