I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I saw his new girlfriend. She was flashing people, short and kinda chubby. I was happy with my life after that.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
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