I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I'm so hungover, I actually considered rolling down the stairs to avoid walking.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
because drunk making out is frowned upon in museums i think
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
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