I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
can u get pink eye on your cock?
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Peed in a church parking lot last night. As if Jesus didnt hate me enough already.
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
i told my boss i want to eat her tits. 90 percent sure i'm getting fired
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Watermelon juice. Makes everything better. Gin. Wine. EVERYTHING.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I need a beard to bite.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize
