So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just saw a picture of your new tub, cant wait to pee in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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