why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
also, i may or may not be wearing a cape right now. hint: i am.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
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