waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
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