i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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