I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
What can I say, I bounce back quick. Never thought the line "my turtle died" would get me so many free drinks last night
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Just heard a girl ask "Wait you're not my boyfriend?!" to a guy wearing the Mickey to her Minnie Mouse on my way home. Made me feel better about myself.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Randomize
