Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
Imagine two people making love on top of a unicorn . . . my life is the opposite of that.
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I or someone else dumped a lot of glitter into my boobs last night.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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