I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
