i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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