i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
Randomize