So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
She wouldnt stop trying to stick her finger in my ass. I wish she wasnt so hot
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
