Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
