Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
I had a dream I gave a blow job to a guy whose dick forked off into two. I'm going to spend the rest of my life confused.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Randomize
