how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
we should paint friendship bongs
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